Looking at this picture you might think she's pretty, confident, popular, and would never have trouble finding a guy? Well 2 outta 4 ain't bad! I do think that I'm pretty (it took me a while to realize it though!).
I recall one time when I was in the car with my mom and grandma and I just blatantly said it out loud..."I'm Ugly!" and burst into tears. Of course they yelled at me saying "You are not ugly! Ain't no child (or granchild)of mine ugly!)", but at the time I believed it.
Throughout school as a whole, I've never been the most popular girl in school. I've always considered myself to be "known", you know, meaning that people "know" who I am. I won't say that I'm a shy person (I'm an ARIES...come on!), but I will say that I'm quiet when I have nothing to say. Fraternizing is not one of my favorite things. Also, I'm really smart (so I've heard!) and people make me out to be some kind of genius or something, but really I don't think I'm that intelligent. I just listen (what a genius, I guess!). Anyways, my quietness along with my intelligence was why I thought that I wasn't popular.
Late elementary to middle school was when I felt it the most (kids can be so cruel!). Though I've always been on point with my clothes...my hair, not so much! My mom would do my hair at home and I would look in the mirror and think I can't wait for other people to see. Then I'd go to school and they would be like, "When you gon' get a perm?" Oh, that hurt! Especially when I had just GOT a perm!
Anywayz, (I have a FABULOUS beautician now! Believe me, he is a miracle worker!), I don't know what ultimately changed my view of myself, but around the 8th grade I began to notice that I WAS beautiful (I guess I actually paid attention to the mirror!). Finnally knowing that I'm pretty, I still was left with the question...why am I not popular???
This is what I came up with: I am a unique individual with a unique personality. I realized that, honestly, I am very different from most of my peers and being different doesn't necessarily make you a freak, it just makes you your own person. I am pretty and truly do have popular potential, however, because I'm different and choose not to blend in with the crowd, I am not.
Today I embrace my weirdness all the time. I tell people all the time that I'm weird and a nerd (a very fashionable one, might I add) and don't care! So today if you're someone like me a)follow me :) and b) never be afraid of being, well...YOU!
